How to Clean Snow Off Your Car or Prepare Your Car For Driving in Snow

If you’ve never lived in snow, but you love driving, well, don’t expect to cruise-control your way on icy roads. The thrill you get from “popping the hood down” with some bikini babes and having wind blow your hair is definitely not an option for you here.

1. Most important thing to driving in snow is to use good logic. Sometimes, you just can’t beat nature. When even human intervention can’t stop the force, then don’t drive in the snow, don’t get it on, because the force don’t stop. When you live in snow towns, employers tend to be more understanding if it is really bad… that is, if you’re not management (they have to show up to work sometimes, even in the worse weather).

2. Again, I must reiterate, you should only drive on roads when it is reasonable. People drive on it all the time when it’s snowy, but do so when you can safely maneuver your car from point A to B and back to A. Also, you must be absolutely alert. Since winter driving is so dangerous, you shouldn’t be drunk, drugged up, or utterly sleepy. This stuff will lead you into trouble.

3. So, once you decide to hit the snowy and icy roads, big thing is drive slow. Don’t give a fuck if the fucker behind you is trying to rush you or driving a big-ass truck (the logic is they will stick to the road better because they are heavier… uh, yeah, how they can bypass physics boggles my mind). So if they want to honk their horn rudely at you or try to cut you off, then let them try. I say let them try because if you’re at the front of the convoy on the highway in anything more than half a foot of snow, it takes some stupid steel balls to try to cut me off. So go slow so that you don’t swerve off into a ditch or tree, and to keep others safe by not hitting them.

4. Not only do you go slow, you also need to keep your distance from other drivers. In snow and ice, it will take you a much longer time to brake to complete stop (same for accelerating). If you like to slam on the brakes or hit the gas, snow driving is not for you. With the slightest turn of the wheel, if you don’t brake gradually, guess whose winning this game of chance: you or physics? Physics is going to slide you like a hockey puck to where ever. So keep a distance and be alert so that you can brake in a reasonable time.

5. Be alert. Be alert. Be alert. Normally, when you’re driving, you only need to keep your attention on the road ahead. When it’s snow season, keep your eyes to your side, too. It’s not reasonable to keep an eye on all areas because you should mainly focus on the road ahead, but be mindful that there are confused and panicky drivers around you, so be alert. Sometimes, something as simple as braking earlier might prevent you from getting hit in the side by another driver how has just spun out or whatever. Not to mention, if you see an accident miles ahead, you should anticipate the increased risk and slow your ass down.

6. Make sure your car is physically fit to handle snow driving. Your life depends on being able to travel a big distance unless you can walk the snow yourself, especially long distances without succumbing to hypothermia even with the best gear. If your car has gas, oil, heater, decent tires, decent engine and no holes, you might manage.

7. Be prepared for the worst. Keep a first aid kit in your car. Have a thick blanket, strong shovel, flashlight, jumper cables, chains for winch, etc. Another tip I learned was to have some preserved meats like summer sausage and cheese on board. And in the last resort that you have to abandon your incapacitated vehicle, make sure you have snow boots and other snow gear so that you can physically trek to find help.

8. I don’t want to say not to have a cell phone, but if you’re stuck in the middle of nowhere in however many inches of snow and no one can get to you in time to rescue you, then your cell phone is pointless. Of course, if you already have it, it’s a plus, but I’m just explaining to you pure logic. That’s why you need to know exactly where you’re going, who’s available to help you, and all that stuff that you shouldn’t take for granted. Sometimes, a single person, a stranger, driving by can save your life if you’re car is incapacitated and you’re stranded. Heck, if you can’t physically risk helping a stranded driver (which is quite understandable in the worst storms), and your cell phone is strong enough, call someone to alert them of the stranded driver’s location.

9. Be cool. This goes along with being alert. Be cool. Be level-headed. Be calm. Road rage or any irrational thinking will cause trouble.

10. You can’t beat it. Our ancestors didn’t give a fuck, they walked that shit, they crossed frozen oceans, they climbed mountains, that’s how bad-ass we are. But in the end, we still can’t beat it. So learn to live with it, but be alert and safe.

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